


Turing Gambit- Just Don't Ask Me How I Am

by Paraprosdokia (ChangeableConsistency)



Category: Avengers
Genre: Gen, Past Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Pepper Potts & Tony Stark Friendship, abandoned work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-08 09:58:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,839
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20833583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChangeableConsistency/pseuds/Paraprosdokia
Summary: I found this on my hard drive and am not sure where I was going with it. I still like it as a study of Tony and Pepper’s friendship.Writing in 2013, and set sometime after the first Avenger’s movie.





	Turing Gambit- Just Don't Ask Me How I Am

She's in the middle of three different memos, one to R & D, one to the board and one to the Energy Secretary- though maybe drinks with Steven would be better than a memo; the Noble laureate was always in a better mood when able to tease Tony about the merits of Berkeley over MIT; and it would probably be good for Tony, too; when speak of the devil, there's an incoming text-

She freezes, absorbing the message. Then immediately calls him, “Tony? He’s really alive? Phil?”

“Why _is_ he Phil?” Tony snaps back, something strained in his voice, when she had been expecting his normal puppy-like exuberance that he rarely resists when he has good news. 

It takes her aback for a moment, but she recovers and asks, “What’s the matter?”

“Fury got in a snit about JARVIS discovering his super secret secrets." 

That explains it; though knowing Tony, he's probably more upset that they got caught than any flak Fury might send his way. Pepper sighs, “Did you hack SHIELD? Again?”

His silence is answer enough.

“Oh Tony.”

“Everyone was delighted with my discovery and then Fury got all,” she smiles, picturing one of Tony's expansive gestures, “and suddenly, it was all my fault and I’m the one in the wrong. There’s gratitude for you.”

She manages to keep the amusement out of her voice, she can't very well let Tony know she agrees with him, the last thing she needs to do is encourage this sort of thing. She notes the bitterness he's trying to cover up with snark; what he needs a project to keep him from spiraling back into the depression he thinks he hid from her after the break up, “It’s supposed to be a very clandestine organization Tony. You can’t just break in.”

“They should invest in some proper security then.” He'd said the same thing about the D.O.D., and SHIELD is more likely to try and 'disappear' anyone that pushes too hard. She never thought she'd long for the days of treason charges. 

On the other hand, Tony really does deal better with someone coming after him with violence than with words. She takes a moment to wish she could kill Obie a second time. If the man hasn't literally ripped out his heart Tony probably would have let him continue to do so metaphorically the rest of his life. 

“Why don’t you show them how it’s done then Tony? You could create something much better," she tries, appealing in equal measure to his ego and his altruism, they're roughly the same size, so if one doesn't work the other usually will. 

“Don’t think I don’t know what you’re doing Ms. Potts. You’re trying to manipulate me into giving Fury tech.” She could give a tinker's damn about Fury, but he can tell he needs the distraction. 

“I’m not trying to manipulate you into anything Tony," Heaven save the poor soul making the mistake of trying to control Tony Stark, "but surely you understand why they might have been upset.” 

“That’s not...I read their files.”

“What?” She closes her eyes, hoping he isn't about to say what she thinks he is.

“Barton and Natasha. I read their files. I think they want to use me for target practice.”

Why did he feel the need to hack back into SHIELD for the files? He had glanced over them before New York and hadn't seem anything for concern at the time. Of course, he was also teaching himself a branch of science that practically didn't exist, so she understands why he might have not have given them as much attention as his curiosity demanded. 

But no, he would't have gone back for them without a reason. Tony had been misjudged base on others reports of him (and not just in the press) enough times that given a choice he'd rather not rely on anything other than his own observations. 

Something had to have happened in the meantime and she feels her stomach clench. 

“What on Earth made you think that would be a good idea?” She asks as calmly as she can. Which isn't exactly calm, but Bethany's not peaking her head in to see if something's wrong, so she counts it as a win. 

“I said something to Barton and he got really upset. I was looking to check I didn’t say anything really offensive. You know not...not my usual charming self...anything really...” She rubs her temples, trying to ward off the impending migraine as Tony trails off before defensively adding, “They’ve all seen mine!”

“Okay,” Pepper says soothingly. “Okay, I understand where you’re coming from but...that may not have been your best decision.” Tony makes an impatient noise at her and she can't help but slip into lecture mode, “You can’t just go and read people’s secrets so you don’t say anything that reminds them of those secrets; that’s just not how human interaction works.”

“See, this is why I need you,” Tony's joking, but she has blink away the tears that prick at her eyes. He's always needed her, but when she gave all of herself it became too much, and she knew it wasn't sustainable. 

She laughs lightly. “Just...next time just stop and think Tony. OK?” He's dancing around something else, but it's not like she can just ask. She lost that right when she made the choice to save her heart by breaking his. 

“Stopping and thinking, sounds boring,” he responds.

She forces another laugh; she's not sure how much longer she can keep the pain from her voice . “So, Phil?”

Tony had forgotten. “Oh yes, Agent. Apparently he’s fine. Healing.” He doesn’t tell Pepper he’s been banned from visiting. “You should have SI send a fruit basket or...no wait. The Captain America trading cards? Dad had a set. They’re in the archives somewhere. Dig them out and send those over. Fury ruined his convincing us that the rumours of his death were not exaggerated.”

He can feel Pepper’s organised little nod. “Alright, I’ll find them. Anything else Mr. Stark?”

“That’ll be all Ms. Potts,” he answers, distracted by imagining Agent actually making an expression when he sees his new cards. Howard’s are in much better shape than the slightly tatty set Fury had thrown across the table anyway.

By the time he’s back at the tower he’s relaxed and focussed. He buries himself immediately in the workshop, designing Fury some real security, and updating the helicarrier’s interface while he’s at it because really? All that turning? No. And that naturally leads him to some new ideas about some Apps for the latest STARKphones and STARKpads and Pepper is happy to approve his designs but only if he goes and talks to the R&D budget people himself. He is convinced this is a ploy to get him into meetings and tells her so and she unsympathetically laughs at him and hangs up. He scowls, sticks his tongue out at the phone and goes to the damn meeting.

“Do you know,” he says to Pepper two days later, “Natasha doesn’t actually own any of her undercover clothes?”

Pepper sighs, creating a rush of static down the phone. “Yes Tony, I did, because I am capable of asking questions that make it seem like I’m interested in other people’s lives.”

“Sounds boring. What kind of dresses does she like?”

“I know this might be hard for you to understand Tony, but people with breasts do have other topics of conversation other than men, shoes, and clothes.”

“That’s true...you can talk for a considerable length of time about nail varnish.”

“I will sell your company and buy shares in Tampax and Vogue magazine.”

“Pepper...” he whines, “I really want to know.”

“Why?” She doesn’t sound judgmental, merely curious.

Tony’s voice brightens. The perfect opening. “Because I am a genius.”

Pepper stifles a giggle, “And this relates to you needing to know about women’s clothing because?”

“Because I have developed a body armour, impervious to everything you can think of including the suit’s repulsors that looks and feels exactly like silk. And Natasha goes on these deep cover operations where she has to look like nothing more than another socialite and then gets shot at. So...” he trails off.

“Why don’t you ask her?”

Tony is glad that Pepper is on the other side of the phone line because she couldn’t fail to notice how he tenses, how his jaw ticks unhappily. He hasn’t told her that he’s not good enough to be an Avenger. He’s sure she isn’t the one who said something to Agent. 90% sure. 80% at least. But even so, he doesn’t want her to know that he’s so pathetic SHIELD still doesn’t want him even after he risked his life helping Fury defy the WSC. He hasn’t told her that the people he fights with on a weekly basis don’t want to be his friend, afraid that she, like so many others, will snigger to herself that Tony’s only friends are those he pays or those he builds. He scoffs. “I’m a genius Pepper. Geniuses don’t ask for input, they present completed masterpieces.”

Pepper, goddess amongst mere mortals as she is, does not press the issue. “We really didn’t talk extensively about dresses. But she admired my blue one. The one I bought myself for my birthday where my boss completely forgot about me.”

Tony knows exactly which one she means. He’s never forgotten the sight of Pepper in that dress, beautiful as always and evoking a desire in him to protect her when vulnerability and unease had uncharacteristically shown through her usual poise. “Why did you work for such an ass?” he asks, not joking as much as he would like her to believe.

“The money was good. Plus, career advancement, PA to CEO in 12 years.”

“Not a totally hopeless case then?”

“Not totally. Tony?”

“Yeah?”

“Do not make matching underwear for the dress. No girl needs armoured panties.”

“Not even-”

“No Tony!”

He laughs, but accepts Pepper’s judgement on this matter. “Shawl? That dress has quite a big dip at the back. Even my body armour only works over an area it’s covering.”

“Yes. Can you do colors?”

“Can I do...of course I can. I’m a-”

“Genius. I know. White then. Not a metallic colour because that limits the kind of jewellery you can wear.”

“Sure. Whatever.”

“Oh and— Tony, I have a call on the other line. Can I call you back?”

“Yeah sure. I warn you, I’m building though so...”

He can hear her roll her eyes, “Please sleep and eat. JARVIS?”

“Yes Ms. Potts,” JARVIS sounds amused, “I will endeavour to make him take care of himself, though I fear it a Sisyphean task .”

“You like her more than me,” Tony mutters, but with no real rancor. 

“And here I always pictured him as Tantalus,” she laughs.

“That is an unfair and completely accurate comparison, Potts.”

Pepper laughs again. “Goodbye, Tony.”


End file.
